2007-11-05
I think you know who I'm referring to.
I'm so sorry I was so stupid and ignorant.
I never bothered to bug you and find out cause I thought you'd tell me when you were ready to, and know that you have I realize how insignificant all that crap I've been through is to yours. This isn't a matter of comparing who's gone through worse problems. It's just this huge realization about absolutely how dumb and how caught up I was in what I was going through.
But seriously. That's enough about my complete stupidity.
I know this is probably very little to say and possibly quite cliched, but I want you to know that I love you, and I'm here for you.
I cannot comprehend a lot of the things you went through. Maybe I can't even understand any of it, cause I haven't gone through it.
But talking to you, finding out and just realizing how strong you are, really makes me. I don't know. It's just this revelation that I'm so stupidly self-pitying most of the time when I'm obviously damn bloody safe and protected.
There are really no words to express how I feel now. It's really all over the place and most of me just wants to cry because I really didn't know, and finding out makes me so fucking scared of losing you. This may sound too cheesy for you but seriously, I don't know how life's gonna be like without you, you know?
Like all the craziness and stupidity and dunno what stunts we pull even though I'm technically supposed to be better behaved, but even if I may get scolded or stripped of my position or whatever, I wouldn't trade in all those wacky times for anything.
Cause I really love all those times, and it's what I cherish amidst all this new talk amidst the board of having to uphold this virtue and that. I miss the days when we could do really stupid things and I would just do it. Heck care with whatever.
And you know what, I think I still will.
Knowing you really made my school life and my life in general a whole lot more fun and crazy and insane, and I really am so, so glad that I've met you.
And again, I want you to know that I really, really love you. A lot a lot a lot. I know, I can't always be around, can't always answer your calls or reply your smses and all that, but I promise that I won't go anywhere. I'll stay here with you, and I'll be here for you.
Thank you. For being you, you wild thing.
You're just completely amazing. (:
abstracity at 10:02 p.m.